Nadite 25th 1995
I had somewhat of a normal day. I went to the gym and did my exercise. Nothing exciting other than me almost hurting myself on the treadmill. 🙁 Ana thought it was funny. Nonetheless, we just kept close and talked about our beliefs and… politics. Those aren’t really things I’d debate about. I don’t like religion and I’m not that big on politics. The two of these are both good and bad for society. It’s good to know about it but I just don’t want to get into it. Ana’s family were Celestians but she found it… ridiculous as she got older and later fell out of it. I consider myself spiritual — meaning I don’t necessarily follow any doctrines or teachings, but I do believe in some sort of supernatural entity or entities…
Continuing the story.
After my confrontation with Hayley I timidly explained to her what I had done to Camila. She got so emotionally distressed that she refused to let me speak further. No matter how apologetic I was she didn’t want to hear more from me. She was broken down to the core. Her makeup dissipated from underneath her pretty eyes as she cried. I persuaded her to stop crying but of course that didn’t help. I followed after her as she stormed out of the restroom through the hallway. Frenzied I was I tried to calm her to avoid creating a scene but being the posh, stuck up bitch she is she just yelled back and called me all sorts of names. There was one name that I didn’t like. She called me a “inferior (negro) sadistic jinx” … This was something that Camila would use against me, so I wasn’t having any more of it. Something in me snapped at Hayley. Then… something happened.
I couldn’t remember exactly what had happened but the aftermath was… …Suddenly I came back to reality. I was on top of her on the floor staring back at her with my right fist at the ready. She had a bleeding lip, nose and there was a small pool of blood on the floor coming from her head. Her eyes were rolled upwards as if she was comatosed. The locker to my left was dented perhaps by her head being smashed into it. As I slowly “regained” control of myself I looked up and around only to see a crowd of students and teachers all staring back at me in shock, fear, disbelief… I froze. I don’t know if she is alive and well. I probably had killed her. She wasn’t moving at all.
A few emotional-teary moments later, the police were called into the school. After writing my statement about the incident earlier on, Principal [Nicholas] Hopewell permanently expelled me from school for assault. I felt devastated, scared and guilty. What would I have told uncle Antonius and aunt Narell? Uncle would have probably gone full demon on my ass. And auntie? Well she’s was upset but she’s fine now. I’ve caused enough trouble within the family. Janet hates me. Bitch! I still have love for my dearest baby cousin Juliet. I hope to see her again.
After writing my statement three police officers entered the office and proceeded to hurl questions at me. I was so nervous that I hesitated to fully answer them. I struggled to maintain eye contact with them because they looked so intimidating that I felt as though they were sucking the soul out of my own body. I felt so insignificant. They placed me under arrest and escorted me out of the school. As I walked through the hallway I felt my mind and soul slowly withdraw from reality. The rest was all too blurry for me to comprehend or commemorate.
I’m tired now….
Not far to go in the story. Only a little bit left….
Ana woke up and cuddled next to me. She was curious about what I was writing in my diary. I told her it’s personal. She smiled at me and…. Kissed me. Mind you that I’m writing this several minutes after our … yeah…
Well… I’m going to bed now.
Your only daughter,