Loesis 3rd 1995
I had sort of a quiet day… without Ana. She’s still recovering from her injuries she sustained from yesterday. I felt very lonely and vulnerable. I’ve not made much friends since I’ve been here. Only borderline enemies for whatever reason. I haven’t been able to make myself comfortable here. It’s just a horrible place to be. I never thought I’d end up here. I wish for some sort of hero to come bail me out.
It’s… cold in here. Oddly cold.
I sense a presence of something. The air feels magnetised gently pulling my hair.
I probably am going crazy.
I thought that by looking ‘sorry’ and apologising before the judge would’ve worked. Maybe he saw me as a threat to society. I’m only 15 for crying out loud. I never really… well maybe I do… I’m just repeating myself.
I wish I could ask for forgiveness. To clear my burdened soul from this guilt.
Forgiveness. Such a devious and broken word. Some people are forgiven for the crimes they commit and get let off. And before you know they repeat their crimes again and beg for forgiveness. It’s like a get-out-of-jail free card or verbal bribery.
And of course… the hardest one, ‘to forgive’. I don’t know how Camila’s parents found it in their hearts to forgive me. They must be crazy.
I’m sorry Camila. Please… forgive me.
I’m not sure if you can hear me or see me. Not that it’d make any difference now.
I’ve rambled for quite a bit. I didn’t really have anything to write about today other than being bored without Ana and the subject of forgiveness.
Again… I sense a weird presence in the room.
I’m going to try and sleep.
If I die… I deserve it.
Your only daughter, Anabelle. xxx